Single Digit Days

Friends, we have officially reached the single digit mark. There are just 9 days remaining until we close on both of our houses.

On the last day of this month, in a span of just under three hours, we will have to sign over our wonderful little house to new buyers and shortly afterwards, sign for ownership of our dream house. The emotions are beyond overwhelming, and for the most part I never saw it coming.

To say that my stress levels are at an all-time high is likely the understatement of my life. Yeah, yeah… I know… it’s not death, divorce, or marital separation. But man, it’s hard stuff.

But what do you mean you never saw it coming?

That sounds ridiculous, right? But honestly, I didn’t. I had some really amazing blinders on, and all I saw was the excitement of the shiny and new.

Then roughly two weeks ago, it crushed me. That weight that had I been slowly piling up on my shoulders, bit by bit, broke my back. I yelled during the day, and I cried at night. I took every comment slung my way as an insult. I turned into the worst version of myself that I had seen in a very, very long time. And on top of all that, it took me far to long to realize that I had become a monster that was hell-bent on destruction.

This weekend I made a conscious effort to reverse myself. I took time for myself to read, to draw, to just relax. I connected with friends and family. I walked through our new house and grounded myself. It took real effort to remind myself that in less than two weeks, we will have moved out of this house and into the new. That the things that aren’t packed will find their way into a box, that our utilities will all be disconnected and reconnected, that our mail will find it’s way to our new mailbox.

Since we were married, Matt and I have been using the same mantra whenever we find ourselves in turbulent waters.

“We’ll make it work. We always do.”

To us that means that if we stand tall and work together rather than pushing against each other, we can make it through anything, in any way, whole.

We can do this. Right?

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